Still sick

Yes, I am still under the weather. However, I have a new job! So that is wonderful.

On the other hand, I feel discouraged - with now three degrees under my belt, I haven't seen a position in my life that has paid me more than about $10 an hour. And those were the highly-paid ones! Dancing has often paid a great deal more, but not recently.

My university course was canceled, but at least that gives me time to teach dance on Wednesday evenings, which is a sure bit of money for a while, anyhow. I am going to meet with the organizer to talk about trying another class for the spring semester.

The woman who does the booking for our play *finally* got back to me today after a phone call with all the forms she'd promised me weeks ago. And with only one week to go til auditions! It's somewhat frustrating to know that you could probably do someone's job a lot better than they can, and yet you're still working for peanuts...

I don't know why I am so grumpy at the moment. Sickness, probably. Anyhow, things seem to be inching forward. Now I have to find a second day job as well because the post I got only offers a couple days a week. Here is hoping that I get up tomorrow feeling better. :)

Sick

I have the flu.

Yesterday's hafla was in a beautiful seaside village called Kinghorn. It has some amazing history, being where King Alexander III of Scotland supposedly died. However, it was all lost on me as I spent the entire day having horrid sneezing fits, which I initially thought were due to mold problems in the flat, but it turned out to be an actual full-blown illness. So, between sneezes, I danced. I was actually really pleased with the performance, which I haven't been in years. Except that I basically ran the trains out of tissue paper as I was sneezing all the way back to Glasgow and didn't get in until 1 am.

Still feeling pretty awful, taking it easy and medicating myself with hot toddys on the advice of a friend. Aside from these, however, no alcohol at all in the last 11 days. I am hoping that this will show up on my waistline eventually. :) I am also going to be posting my progress in each goal daily, once I get over this sickness.

The Kinghorn hafla was a lot of fun. Seeing a supportive dance community is always a joy.

Happy

I worked my first day today, with someone who loves folklore as much as I do! I feel very positive about this.

Today I was speaking to a French friend of mine and realized I couldn't remember the French word for 'happy'. That says a lot about my state of mind in the last few years.

I've realized, talking to him, that I love Scotland now, the cobblestones, the rain, the strange words, the tea, the black taxis, everything. I feel much more positive about just about everything - and I hope that indicates that things are looking up for me.

Tomorrow is my first full day of work, and then I have the hafla on the weekend. I'm really excited about that as well. It's so nice to write down positive thoughts!

Yay!

Looks like things may be shaping up! I will be working this week, and if I do well, a receptionist post in the city centre will be mine for six weeks. *SIGH OF RELIEF*

Also, I am teaching belly aerobics tonight, and saw a new space for teaching, which I will take. So - as long as the uni course I am teaching goes, that means I'll be teaching almost every night, plus play rehearsal.

Weather's been odd today - it's hard to know how to dress. It's hot, then cold, then rainy.

Even so, Scotland seems so much sunnier this time around.

Falling into Place

It looks as though I might be in luck; the place that originally hired me to work at the prison has offered me a different position this week. Hopefully, if I do well, they will provide me with further assignments.



I went to visit the person booking rooms for our play, and found that she was off today. I have been trying to get her to ensure our rooms are booked for the past three months and have had no luck. I ended up talking to a different person in the office who told me that none of the dates were even in the system! And the entire building had advertising for our auditions up on the walls. He said that he booked us in for auditions and performances but was going to have to get back to me on our rehearsal schedule. This is very frustrating, and makes me wonder what on earth this lady does in her office. He said that we still had to go through her for bookings, so I suppose we will just have to deal.



I will be teaching a class tomorrow evening and having a very busy day tomorrow arranging several things, including yet another dance class. Adding a couple college classes will make me just about where I'd like to be as a dance instructor (provided everything goes well). So here's hoping!

Distraught

It looks as though I will never find out what it's like to work in a juvenile prison. I needed to have a special certificate (which I had, but have misplaced). I could not get a copy from either the government or my former employer. So I lost the first day job I've been offered. I am fairly upset about this because the timing was perfect; I'm out of money and really needed to make a good impression. Clearly this was not the way to go about it. So I am once again unemployed, and scrambling. I don't know why no one can get me a copy; the government was able to give me a number but the employers weren't willing to accept that in lieu of the actual piece of paper. So I am very frustrated now.

Last night had a brilliant meeting with my two musical directors for the play. They are so talented I felt a bit overwhelmed. However, I hope that our combined talents along with my drive will make this a great play.

Without this job I was counting on, I am not sure how I am going to go about renting my studio space or paying rent in general. Finding work here is as difficult as anywhere else, except that I also have the added problem of being from overseas. I am feeling pretty discouraged because although everything else is going well, I really need to have a day job for everything to work out.

Bonny Banks

Today I went to Loch Lomond!

I saw the SeaLife aquarium, which was amazing and reminded me of Hawai'i. Then walked through a food and drink fair, along a river, and lay in the grass on the grounds of a castle overlooking the beautiful loch!

I also had some amazing haggis, neeps and tatties with whisky cream sauce at an inn next to the train station; it's called the Tullie - absolutely recommended! Dessert - or 'pudding' - was roasted marshmallow Bailey's Irish Cream cheesecake.

Does it get any better than this?

So, well, diet not going so well, but will be having Pacific Rim salmon and Mediterranean red pepper tomato soup for dinner to make up for the afternoon feast. Third day without alcohol; they say that will make you gain weight faster than anything, so I am happy about my progress there.

I have been finding it difficult to write in this blog; for some reason I want to be circumspect rather than talk about everything that's been going on, so I'm going to try and write more bravely, starting today. :)

Another Day

So here I am, the second day of trying to make a real go of this. I have eaten fairly well, so I am proud of myself for that.

Today I got a job, although it's rather nerve-wracking. I will be working at a juvenile prison. I took the position because it's all I've been able to find. It's only for a month or so, hopefully I will be okay with it.

Things are shaping up - I found a studio to rent at a very reasonable rate and will be teaching classes come October. So I have university teaching, dancing, play directing in the evenings, and finally a day job (at least for a while; but I hope that if they see I can be reliable and a good worker, I will get further temp jobs with this agency). It looks as though I will be very busy in the months to come, which was what I was hoping for - productivity, achievements, and hopefully - happiness.

Dedication

Well, I have let this blog slide a bit, since I have been busy with friends and doing other things.

However, I have decided that today I will be starting a six week change of diet and habit. So this is day one, and I will blog daily about it.

I have been thinking of how I used to hang out in coffeeshops, and now everyone hangs out in bars. I wish that the coffeeshop would come back as a place to see friends. I went to the bar last evening, and while I had fun at first, one of my friends started talking to me about an incident that happened here last year, and had been twisted out of all recognition by the other people involved so as to not look like they were at fault. It seems that every time I try to move on, I am dragged back and down by things that have happened in the past. I am hoping to avoid that in the future.

I haven't sent in anything for my novels, but I will be performing next weekend and going to see some studio space I could hire out for teaching dance. My primary concern at this point is finding a day job. It seems impossible at the moment, and money is very scarce. Still, I am plugging along. I put up audition posters for our new play, and will be meeting again with the musical directors on Sunday, where we will hopefully put something together for the auditions.

Here goes my first day of change, which should have happened the day I returned, but at least I am dedicating myself to it now. Also, my new job comes with a free gym membership, so I will be starting my regimen again soon.

This weekend I will be going to see some other parts of this country, which I took for granted the first time I lived here. I am trying to be positive.

Sleepy

Last night was my welcome back party. It was fairly sedate but still a lot of fun.

I've been more affected by my friend's admission that she never really liked me today than I have been in the past. Something about today, I suppose.

The play auditions are coming up soon, so things are rolling with that. I've been invited to perform at a hafla, so that should be fun. Mainly I feel very exhausted. No nibbles from prospective employers as of yet, but I am still working on sending out applications.

I haven't done a lot of work on the weight loss front, as all the food I once despised here seems wonderful to me - and doing a lot of celebrating too! So hopefully things will settle down now and I'll be able to focus more on that. Currently there isn't a great deal going on, but eventually it will be so busy I won't be able to think, so I will take this time to try and heal, turn over a new leaf, start a new chapter...or possibly a new book.

Exhausted

I have been running around like mad today, getting the usual errands done that need doing after a move - a new bank account, meeting with my professor, grocery shopping, the works. I'm fairly tired.

This blog was meant to be a record of my work toward being myself. I can report that the grocery shopping, at the very least, is moving in the direction of weight loss: I purchased only the things that I was eating when I was on a restricted diet, so now I will just need to work on willpower. I have been applying for jobs, and was finally contacted by the owners of the stage rights for our planned musical, and that seems to be going ahead fairly well.

I want to focus on dance next - finding a venue in which to teach. I had a teaching gig at the university, but turned it down when it was offered this fall because I didn't know if I'd be returning, and another dancer is now teaching that class. However, she says I can teach it again in January, as she is moving away. I would like to have that class again.

No bites on my novel yet; I will have to start querying again soon. They say you only need one 'yes'...

I am still feeling positive.